Bringing Good Out of a Bad Situation, Part 1
…the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory that is to be revealed to us.”
Romans 8:18
In your mind, picture a 52-year-old executive, writer, artist and speaker who has a national radio broadcast. What would you think if I told you that same person has been a quadriplegic since she was 17? Some of you know her name—Joni Erikson Tada. Her life has been an inspiration to many because she believes God can bring good out of the worst situation. She believes that suffering has purpose through faith in God, for God can use suffering to mold our character to make us a better person inside.
Are you going through a difficult time? Does your hardship and suffering seem meaningless?
Remember, God can take the worst life brings and turn it into something good if you’ll put your trust in Him. He’s in the business of turning chaos into a masterpiece when we turn our life over to Him.
Are you willing to believe God can bring good out of even your situation? I assure you He can.
Grief
“Therefore, you have grief now; but I will see you again, and your heart will rejoice, and no one will take your joy away from you.”
John 16:22
Losing a loved one or a close friend is never easy, but understanding the stages of grief can sometimes help. Grief involves numbness and denial, an inability to feel when the news of the death arrives, and a sense of disbelief that the person is really gone. It involves tearful emotion as the reality of a permanent separation sets in.
It can involve anger at God or life as the world continues on when you’re hurting so bad. It can involve depression, feeling that life is meaningless, when the loss of the loved one has occurred. And, finally, there is acceptance—coming to terms with the loss, and beginning to move on with life.
The grieving process takes time, but it can be overcome. And the greatest strength for getting through it is found in the Lord. Remember, God understands your grief. He knows what it’s like to have a child die. He saw His own son, Jesus, die for us all. He loves you and wants to help you overcome your grief if you’ll let Him.
Contentment
“I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances.”
Philippians 4:11
One of the most rare commodities in society is contentment. Advertisers would have us believe that their product is the key to finding fulfillment and happiness. Television programming reinforces this message and fills our homes with images of things. It’s like this “stuff” is essential to our happiness.
Seeking satisfaction in things will never bring about contentment. It just leads to further dissatisfaction. So how do we find contentment? Like so many other things, contentment is a choice—a by-product.
A man who had more than his share of difficulty in life said, “I have learned to be content regardless of my circumstances.” It was the apostle Paul who said that. How did he do it? The key was found in his relationship with Jesus Christ. That’s the key for anyone. We all have the same opportunity to find contentment. It’s a by-product of our relationship with Jesus Christ, our Savior and Lord. That is the key to being content.
Facing Rejection
“As for me, I said in my alarm, ‘I am cut off from before Your eyes.’ Nevertheless You heard the voice of my supplications when I cried to You.”
Psalm 31:22
Rejection is a part of life. We all face it, while trying out for a team and being cut, or being fired or laid off. Toughest of all may be rejection in the family through a divorce, a child feeling rejected by a parent, or one sibling rejecting another.
Remember though, God’s power is sufficient for you to overcome rejection. How?
1. You have to trust Him completely to bring good out of the worst rejection.
2. You have to confess to God any feelings of resentment, bitterness, or anger toward that person and ask God to forgive you. Remember, bitterness is the poison we drink while hoping the other person dies.
3. You have to ask God to give you the power to forgive that person who rejected you and the strength to move on.
Time to Turn on the Light
“I am the Light of the world; he who follows Me will not walk in the darkness, but will have the Light of life.”
John 8:12
When you’re staying in an unfamiliar place, do you ever awaken in the night and get up without turning on the light? Next thing you know, you’re tripping over a suitcase or walking into a table. The last time that happened to me, man, did it hurt! But when you turn on the light, everything is clear.
Well, a lot of folks are trying to make it through life in the dark—spiritual darkness—and there’s a lot of self-inflicted pain and unnecessary falls that take place. Yet, amazingly, most people in the dark feel they’re doing just fine on their own. It’s really kind of pitiful.
But Jesus tells us He’s the Light of the world. He means He is the enlightenment about God, man, and life. Otherwise, we’re in the dark spiritually. We keep stumbling, falling, and, eventually, feeling frustrated by it all. Hey, isn’t it time for some of you folks to turn on the light, really see God, and understand life? If you do, then everything will make sense.
God’s Family
“That is, it is not the children of the flesh who are children of God, but the children of the promise are regarded as descendants.”
Romans 8:29
There are good families and bad families—good ones we’re drawn to and bad ones we want to get away from. But no matter what type of family you have, no earthly family lasts forever. They all end in separation through death or man’s choice.
But I have good news. There is a family that lasts forever. It begins here on earth, and is only realized in perfection after we die. When a person decides to become a follower of Christ, he or she enters a giant family of faith—the church.
Now, there’s no perfect church. If you find one, please don’t join it because you’ll mess it up in a skinny second because we’re all sinners who fall short of God’s best. But in the family of faith, we’re forgiven sinners who begin a process of being transformed into the person God wants us to be. Looking for a family that lasts? Know Jesus and enter into the only family that lasts forever.
The Myth of Quality Time
“You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up.”
Deuteronomy 6:7
The May, 1997, issue of Newsweek had a cover story about the myth of “quality time” versus “quantity time.” Ronald Levant, a psychologist at Harvard Medical School, said “I think ‘quality time’ is just a way of deluding ourselves into shortchanging our children. Children need vast amounts of parental time and attention. It’s an illusion to think that they’re going to be on your timetable and that you can say, ‘O.K., we’ve got half an hour, let’s get on with it.’” In other words, Levant is saying that this idea that quality of time replaces quantity of time, that so many boomer parents have bought into, is really a myth.
There is no real quality of time unless we have a quantity of time to be with our children, to be with them during those teachable moments when they’re dealing with everyday life-events. So follow God’s will. Invest a quantity of your time with your children, and He’ll reward you with a quality relationship that is rich, indeed.
Thanksgiving
“Was no one found who turned back to give glory to God…?” – Luke 17:18
One of life’s most common oversights is not taking time to say thanks. We get in such a rush that we often forget.
Years ago, ten men with the dreaded disease of leprosy saw Jesus. They were a long distance away, for leprosy was the most feared diseased of that day. They were outcasts; people didn’t want to touch them for fear of getting the disease. They were treated like many today who have AIDS.
These lepers cried out to Christ to have mercy on them, and He did. He healed them all. What a fantastic day that must have been!
Those ten guys got so excited that they all began to run and tell what had happened.
But one of them turned around and took time to worship and thank Jesus—just one. Jesus asked him, “Weren’t there ten? Where are they?” Even God desires to hear thanks.
This week, don’t miss a great opportunity to get in the habit of taking time to say thanks—to God for His blessings, to friends and loved ones, and to any who helped you along the way.
Crisis of Grief
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted, and saves those who are crushed in spirit.” – Psalm 34:18
It isn’t a pleasant thought, but at various points in life many of the people we love most are going to die – parents, spouses, friends, siblings, and sometimes children. The stats on death are 100%. For everyone who lives, death eventually comes. We don’t want to think about it, but it’s a reality of life.
When it comes, we need to remember the various stages of grief – shock, numbness, denial, anger, depression, and eventually acceptance. In going through the various stages of grief, hold on to these thoughts:
- It’s a process, it can’t be rushed, but it doesn’t last forever.
- With the help of God, it can be a time of growth. If you don’t know God, get to know Him.
- Seek the help of others. We all need the support of others to get through it.
- Remember that the first year is the toughest. Don’t try to make major decisions right away; give yourself some time.
- If your loved one was a Christian, you can live with the hope that you can see them again. This comes when you, also, know Christ.
Grief is tough, but with God’s help, and the help of others, you can make it.
Going Home
“So he got up and came to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.” – Luke 15:17
Robert Frost wrote, “Home is the place where when you have to go there, they have to take you in.” There’s no place like home. No matter how bad we screw up or how disappointing life gets, it’s the one place they have to take us in.
Jesus told of a wayward son who screwed up big time, and he wasted all his dad had blessed him with. He was so hungry and homeless he wanted to eat leftover slop only fit for animals. But he came to his senses and thought about home. He knew he didn’t deserve to go there, but he did. And his dad was so overwhelmed with joy he welcomed him home.
The dad represents God, and the wayward son represents you and me. It’s Jesus’ way of telling us that we all screw up—but nobody screws up so bad that when he decides to come home to the Lord, the Lord won’t welcome him back to a right relationship with Him. Is it time for you to come home to the Lord?
Appreciation
“In everything give thanks, for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.” – 1 Thessalonians 5:18
Have you ever given a gift or done a favor for someone who didn’t express appreciation? It’s not much fun and certainly doesn’t inspire us to give to that person again. But, if we’re honest, we all have to admit that we’ve all failed to say thank you.
Think about the people in service positions we encounter daily. Do you thank the folks at the dry cleaners when your shirts are ready when promised? How about saying thanks to the person behind the counter in the fast food restaurant? Do you express appreciation to the people in your office who answer the phone or process the mail?
Everyone likes to be appreciated, to hear “thank you” for things they’ve done well. Why not start today saying thanks to the people who make your day run more smoothly. While you’re at it, don’t forget to thank God for all His blessings in your life.
Saying “thank you” is always appreciated. It sure makes the day a bit brighter.
Storms of Life
“But everyone who hears these words of mine and does not put them into practice is like a foolish man who built his house on the sand.”
Matthew 7:26
Are you ready for the storms of life? Maybe you’re currently in a life storm or have recently endured one. One thing’s for sure, storms come to us all. The loss of a job, the loss of a spouse, or the words from the doctor, “You’ve got cancer,” are all storms. When we live life, storms come.
Jesus tells a story about two men. One man built his house on the sand. The winds and the rains came and his house fell in. Another built his house on the rock, and the winds and the rains came, but it withstood the storm. The key difference was in the foundation. The greatest foundation for withstanding the storms of life is the rock of Jesus Christ. A close personal relationship with the Lord builds a solid foundation, and that relationship comes through trusting Him and following Him day by day.
Storms come. Is your foundation secure, built on the rock of Jesus Christ?
The good news is, even if you’ve been blown away by a storm, it’s not too late to start rebuilding upon the right foundation.
The Internet
“Everyone who looks on a woman to lust for her has committed adultery with her already in his heart.”
Matthew 5:28
In the sense of providing accessible knowledge for all mankind, the Internet has certainly been heralded as one of the greatest tools that has come about since the Guttenberg printing press. Certainly it is a tremendous tool for doing business and research. But have you thought about one of the horrific problems we face because of the Internet? It’s called pornography.
Think about the progression in the last few years. Twenty or thirty years ago an adult male who wanted to view very hard-core pornography would have to go into an adult theater or adult bookstore and risk the embarrassment of somebody seeing him. A few years later, video rentals and cable TV made access easier, with less risk of embarrassment. And now with the Internet, hardcore pornography has come into the privacy of the home.
Men and women, listen. Pornography eats away at the core of your intimacy with God and your marriage relationship. It is degrading to women and always harmful to man’s thoughts and attitudes. It creates an appetite that can never be satisfied. You need to take pro-active steps to avoid the temptations of pornography. And if it has you, confess to God your sin and if married, confess it to your wife. Then take steps for healthy accountability so that your wife or parents have access to anything you view. If addicted, seek outside help. Like an alcoholic needs Christ and AA, so do you. Do it now before it destroys your life, your marriage, and your family.
Convenience Belief
“If anyone wishes to come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me.” – Mark 8:34
When I was 16 years old, I would have told you I was a Christian. I had grown up in a Christian home; but at a Young Life camp in Colorado, I heard a message about God’s love for me through Christ’s death on the cross. Realizing all He went through for me convicted me that I believed in God by convenience. I called on God before a big game, a big test, OR A BIG DATE. I was basically using Him.
But after realizing God’s love for me, I decided to follow Jesus as the number one priority of my life. I began a personal relationship with God through Christ.
He loves you just as He loves me. He gave His life for you so that you can know Him personally and be sure of eternal, abundant life with Him. If you just believe in God by convenience like I used to, why don’t you consider committing your life to following Jesus in faith? It’s a life you’ll never regret. It’s a life of ultimate meaning and purpose.
Parenting Preschoolers
“Train up a chld in the way he should go, Even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Proverbs 22:6
Proverbs 22:6 teaches us to “train up a child in the way he should go, even when he is old he will not depart from it.”
Train up means to lead and to teach; teaching your preschooler to obey and to understand who is boss.
In the way he should go means being a student of your child. God has created each of them uniquely, and we want them to discover who God wants them to be.
When he is old he will not depart from it. “Old” doesn’t mean teenager or young adult, but aged man.
Along the way, some kids break their parents’ hearts, but God’s Word offers hope that they will eventually come around. Take time to be a leader and a student of your children when they’re small, and there’s a far better chance they’ll listen to you and do what’s right when they’re old.
Starting Point For Being A Good Parent
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church…”
Ephesians 5:25a
Parenting is an overwhelming calling. We get started with no experience, and by the time we have experience, it’s often too late. So much is out of our control and there are so many negative influences in our children’s lives.
To be a good parent, where should we begin?
The most important starting point is for Mom and Dad to love and respect each other. Why? Because so much of our children’s identity is wrapped up in Mom and Dad. So much of their security is knowing that Mom and Dad really love each other. This means, even if you’re divorced, don’t make the mistake of tearing down your child by tearing down your “ex.” Seek to build up your child by portraying your “ex” in the best possible light, even when it’s difficult.
Parenting is tough, but the most important way to be a good parent is to love your spouse. God commands it and our children need it. It provides them great security. It helps them feel loved and whole.
A Hand to Hold in the Darkness
“For you light my lamp; the Lord my God illumines my darkness.”
Psalm 18:28
Why are children afraid of the dark? Maybe it’s a fear of being left alone; a feeling of separation; their vivid imagination, or shadows in the dark.
The fact is, children fear the dark for many of the same reasons adults do. It seems many fears intensify in the night—especially sleepless nights. But I have good news. God is with us wherever we go.
Listen to the Psalmist: “If I say, ‘Surely the darkness will overwhelm me. Where can I go from Your Spirit? Or where can I flee from Your presence? If I ascend to Heaven You are there. If I make my bed in the place of the dead, You are there. If I dwell in the remotest part of the sea, even there Your hand will lead me, and Your hand will lay hold of me.’”
Like a loving Father, God offers us a hand to hold in life’s darkest hours. He’ll carry us through the darkness and lead us where we need to go.
True Faith vs. Legalism
But you, why do you judge your brother? Or you again, why do you regard your brother with contempt? For we shall all stand before the judgment seat of God.
Romans 14:10
In March of 2002, BBC news told of a shocking event in Saudi Arabia. The Saudi religious police prevented the fire department from rescuing 15 of the 800 girls trapped inside their burning school. Their reason for blocking the rescue? Because those 15 girls were not wearing correct Islamic dress. The religious police warned the rescuers that “it would be sinful to approach them.” Fifteen girls died because they were not wearing the headscarves and black robes required by the kingdom’s strict interpretation of Islam.
While this is an extreme example, this incident shows the mindset of legalism. This is what can happen when man-made rules are put before the laws of God. And that mindset is not restricted to Islam. Legalism exists in every religion, including Judaism, Buddhism, Hinduism, and most certainly Christianity. Legalism consists of man-made rules with self-appointed judges who induce guilt and oppress normal life. Because legalists place their laws above God’s laws, legalism leads to slavery.
Jesus fought legalism all through His ministry, and true faith in Christ leads to the ultimate freedom. Freedom to follow God and know God. Freedom from captivity of legalism and sin. Legalism leads to spiritual death, while true faith in Christ is about abundant living in Him.
Overcoming Fear
“Immediately he spoke to them and said, “Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.”
Mark 6:51
To learn courage you have to know fear. Isaac Stern, the great violinist, observing a nine-year-old playing the violin amazingly well, said. “You can’t really tell how an artist will be until the teen years, for that is when fear comes in. Then and only then can you see if the person has courage. You can’t learn courage until you know fear.” Fear can paralyze us. Finding the courage to overcome it is a real key to successful living.
One day, Jesus’ disciples were caught at sea in a storm. They were afraid they wouldn’t make it. Jesus walked out to them and said, “Take courage! It is I. Do not be afraid.”
That’s the key to finding courage in the face of fear. It comes through faith in Jesus Christ. Fear and faith do not mix—they’re like oil and water. You see, when faith kicks in, fear moves out, and when faith disappears, fear moves in like a tidal wave. The key to finding the courage to overcome fear is faith in Jesus.
Evidence of Life After Life
“Mary Magdalene came, announcing to the disciples, “I have seen the Lord…”
John 20:18
All through the ages, man has speculated about life after life. Dante’s Divine Comedy seeks to describe it. Modern medical science has added to the speculation with its study of near-death experiences. All kinds of religions offer their theories.
But the greatest evidence of life after life is based on the historical evidence that Jesus rose from the dead. Christianity is the only faith founded by a man who died and come back to life. No other religion makes that claim.
Historical accounts of His appearances to His disciples and over 500 people at once were written within twenty years of the event. His disciples faced martyrs deaths for refusing to quit preaching of His death and resurrection.
People don’t willingly die for something they know is a hoax. The one thing that would have stopped Christianity in its tracks would have been for Rome or religious authorities to reveal the dead body of Jesus. They never did. The best evidence of life after life is the historical evidence of Jesus’ resurrection. Believe it and one day you’ll live it.
What a Wife Most Needs From Her Husband
“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church…”
Ephesians 5:25
Dr. James Dobson was asked, “Why are men so insensitive to women’s needs today?”
He answered, “I question whether men have really changed all that much. I doubt if men ever responded as women preferred. Did the farmer of a century ago come in from the fields to say, ‘Tell me how it went with the kids today’? No. He was as oblivious to his wife’s nature then as husbands are today.”
So men, if you’re struggling to meet your wife’s needs, the Bible gives a few tips:
Physical affection. Not just sex, but a tender touch-a few hugs all through the day.
Security. A wife desires a sense of security, physically, financially and emotionally.
Romantic love. Who do you think buys all those romance novels and like to watch those chick flicks?
Understanding. This means listening more than telling her what to do.
Reassurance. Knowing you think she’s beautiful, in a society of constant comparison.
Spiritual leadership. Not dictatorships, but servant leadership, like Christ for His church.
A wife most needs love from her husband and these are ways to show it.
What a Man Most Needs From His Wife
“However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.”
Ephesians 5:33
So many wives are clueless about what their husbands need the most. They often make the mistake of thinking that his greatest need is like hers—the need for love. But the husband’s greatest need is for respect. This is how God has wired him. So wives, how can you live this out?
Praise: Build him up in a world where he often gets beaten down. Just think how much you like to hear the words,”I love you,” and praise him just that much and more.
Seek to be his best friend: With his wife, he needs support not competition. Men as a whole, are not as relational and verbal as women.
Have a willingness to follow his lead: You’re kidding! In the 21st century you want me to follow his lead?
Well, if this makes you mad, argue with God. It’s His Book. This is how you really respect your husband. When he senses this, it’s amazing how much he will strive to love you in return.
Life Support
For the eyes of the Lord move to and fro throughout the earth that He may strongly support those whose heart is completely His.
2 Chronicles 16:9
All of us enjoy being appreciated. Whether it be on the athletic field, the stage, the classroom or in the more insignificant events of life, every one of us enjoy being praised. Our confidence is bolstered when a person of authority or that we respect supports us and is on our side. Getting that pat on the back or that word of encouragement makes us want to do even better. We work harder. We take on our problems with more determination and vigor. We are infused with a “want to.”
Scripture reminds us that God wants to be our coach, our encourager. The Creator of this Universe desires to support us, and support us “strongly”. He is simply looking for the person that will submit to His leadership. He wants all our heart…all the time…not just when we think we need Him. He is always reaching out to us. It is not a question of being found by God; He knows exactly where we are. It is a matter of completely giving our heart to Him and following His lead. If God is for us, who can be against us?!
Big Problems with the First Family
“…Believe in the Lord Jesus, and you will be saved…”
Acts 16:31
Let’s talk about the big problems with the first family.
No, I’m not referring to the President and the First Lady, but to the original first family, Adam and Eve. They were the first family to have big problems—I mean big problems. Adam and Eve sinned by disobeying God, and their sin infected the whole human race.
They had two boys, Cain and Abel, and the problem of sin carried over to their children’s lives. Cain became so jealous of Abel’s blessings that he murdered him.
The first family had real problems—from Adam and Eve’s simple disobedience, one of their children murdered his brother. And the family of man still struggles with the same problem of sin today. But God has a solution in the person of Jesus Christ, Who came to save us from our sin problem. Each time a person looks to Christ in faith for salvation from sin, it breaks the negative chain of sin that enslaves people and families.
